hi! on a thursday!

Thursday, July 16, 2015

hello from a thursday morning! i am currently sitting in my purple muumuu drinking my fourth diet coke of the day. whoops. if we are being super honest, i have spent the last hour googling ben higgins (new bachelor!), birth stories (...i know nothing. i am fascinated.)(also SIDE NOTE : like, so many people get their makeup done before they give birth because of pictures. YES QUEEN!) and new zealand competition eater (HAVE YOU SEEN HER?!?! she eats FIVE POUNDS of ramen!). also bios of teen mom because janelle.

this week was exciting + by exciting, i mean i had to go to the lady-doctor twice.
i actually kind of like the lady-doctor + feel oddly confident with my legs stirrups. hahhaahaha. i'd like to take that back.
anyways, when i walked into his office it was floor to ceiling covered in tribal garb. like, FLOOR TO CEILING. rugs, blankets, statues, beads, oil paintings. at this point i was still feeling uncomfortable so i told him that my husband was a native american + offered him the five tidbits i know about his tribe (MICHIGAN! CHERRIES! TURTLES! CASINO! ...CHERRIES?). he ate it up.

when i went in again, he had a few students with him who were observing (who did not find any of my jokes about seeing my underparts funny?) + proceeded to tell them that i was a full-blown native american + asked if i played lacrosse? because the native american in me would be great at it? have i been to a pow wow? how often do i visit my tribe? i gently reminded him that it was my husband, not me, who was a native american but he t o t a l l y didn't hear me / ignored it + continued to ask questions so i just rolled with it + retold the story of pocahontas as my own. by the end of it, i was basically an indian princess with an open back gown.

this all reminds me of my 19th birthday party (it was a surprise! SURPRISE!!!!!) when i walked in + a boy who was in my class + who i interacted with basically every day shouted "EMILY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" + i was very, very confused because WE TALKED EVERY DAY! hahahah. it was too late to correct him. emily it is.

anyways, my family is coming today which is exciting. i need to clean + sort out some self-tanning blunders.


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