let’s just cut to the point, here: on saturday i played a little game of self-exploration and tested how my body would react to a heavy dose of too much fiber.
it died. like, sitting on the bathroom floor of rubio’s trying to heed to sydney’s advice of ‘just relax! let ‘em fly!’ type dying.
i don’t really know how it started? perhaps it was just out of pure laziness and unwillingness to make real food? or perhaps it was just out of boredom-eating and accessibility? no matter. in any case, on saturday i ate three fiber one bars and a large bowl of raisin bran (…and dip n’ dots…and 5 oz. of FREE yogurtland!) you do the math.
in any case, while i was sitting on the ground of rubio’s, i had a good and heavy think. good and heavy thinks are beneficial to the body, especially when paired with large dosages of fiber. but anyways, as i was sitting there i got all metaphorical and thought about how this situation was like a metaphor. or a simile, rather.
like, maybe fiber was like all things good and happy in the world, like little kitty cats and long sunday naps, and if you had to much of those all the time, it would eventually kill me? or maybe fiber was like christmas? like, one of them is fine but if christmas was every day, you would all end up on the floor rolling around with stomach aches from too much shopping and too much christmas candy and too much christmas music?
or maybe it’s a metaphor about life. that if you just cram everything that’s important into one part of your life then you are going to be paying later? or something?
or maybe you just should never eat that much fiber. ever.