marathon-ing // in which i talk for one mile about meghan trainor + pee in the woods.

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 (the funny part about this picture is i felt like i was FLYING. literally thought i was going so fast. i later watched the video jeff took + almost choked laughing at how slow i was actually going.)

well, by the pure grace of god, caffeinated energy chews, old kanye west jams + amy poehler's audiobook yes please, i finished the marathon. despite the whole getting-up-at-three-a.m. part + the where-are-the-bathrooms? part + especially, especially the why-does-everyone-here-have-amazing-legs aspect, it wasn't that bad.



i ran the race with my avery-friend! unfortunately her knee started acting up during the downhill parts + we separated for the last quarter. in the dramatized movie reenactment of my life, this part will be extremely heart-wrenching + maybe she will die or something + then everyone will hate me + quote lilo + stitch to me, "ohana means family. family means no one gets left behind" + then i will turn to alcoholism and dog fighting to mend my aching heart + guilt + it will. be. tragic. also, in the movie, i will win the whole marathon or something + have thick blonde hair. you know, to keep it accurate and raw.

in actuality, i looked back + gave her a thumbs up + a nod + then called her like, five minutes later. but, you know. hollywood.

ANYWAYS. i finished the race with a lady named leigh who started telling me how much she loved meghan trainor + due to pure exhaustion, i started to have all these really deep + well thought out opinions about her + her impact on society + yadda yadda yadda. where did this come from?! I DON'T KNOW! i'm convinced something happens to you when you're beyond exhausted; for me, it was not caring at all if people saw me peeing on the side of the road or singing out loud to my music +, evidently, talking ad naseum about meghan trainor.

we finished the race + i hugged leigh + then hugged this old man i didn't know + jeff just stared like, what the h-e-double hockey sticks happened this morning? it was all a blur.

now i'm nursing a foot injury + a nasty sinus infection + binge watching the office. i don't feel one bit bad about it because I RAN A MARATHON! i can binge watch netflix + eat bagels + beg jeff to bring me bubbly beverages if i want to! i'm hoping i can drag this out for a bit. at least until i get pregnant because i plan to not move for nine months. (cue evil laugh) i'm hoping to do another one but maybe this time actually train because holy shiz, what was i thinking?

p.s. this is coming to you from my fixed laptop! bless you little apple angels! they even cleaned it up + everything! it was sooooo dusty + dirty. the guy at the store asked me what i did for an occupation + i told him i worked in a saw mill + he sort of, kind of believed me. it was that bad.

p.p.s. look at the sunrise!!! if i were a different person, i would be like THIS WAS SO WORTH THE PAIN! or maybe like WAKING UP EARLY = WORTH IT. i wouldn't go as far to say THAT, but it was pretty.