i dole out my love fairly easily. i mean, i generally love people until they give me a good reason not to (like donning a foam finger to the vma's...and even then...) + will love any food you throw my way + ...actually, no. this is all foiled. i really don't like cats. onwards! i feel like i've been in love many times, but in many different ways + capacities. there was the, you play football + i need a date for homecoming! type of love that somehow lasted long past homecoming and the you're moving soon + i care about you enough to hang on till april for good face type of love and the you are really funny and have a moped! type of love that transitioned into you are a good friend type of love that quickly fizzled into you are the only person i know at this particular moment in life that watches workaholics + finds costco exciting type of love.
it's all very romantic + rambly, no?
but i was never in-love until jeffrey stapleton.
i remember the first time that i realized i was in love with him. we were watching we bought a zoo with all of his roommates in his tiny apartment + were squished together on a couch. he was wearing a dress shirt, tie, and jeans which i noted and found...interesting? what exactly was he doing? (he later admitted he was channeling joseph gordon-levitt in 500 days of summer and didn't quite achieve the look he was going for) it was endearing + weird all at the same time.
right in the middle of the movie, after matt damon turned distressed father turned zookeeper gave his son the speech about "20 seconds of insane courage", i lurched for his hand. oh the stomach flips! oh the excitement! he warmly greeted my hand with his hand + proceeded to tickle my arm. tickle my arm! my arm had never been tickled before! praise the land + the sea + this joseph gordon-levitt, arm tickling man next to me. i was in love. i had to be.
it was early on in our whirlwind relationship, but i felt so loved + cared after + why was he wearing a tie again? it was romantic in a sort of jeffrey stapleton type of way.
and for the record, in the movie of my life at this very scene i request miss independent by kelly clarkson to be playing in the background. it's all so fitting.