happy birthday, dear morgan!

morgan is my tall, blonde friend. she goes to culinary school here in provotown but we have been friends forevsies. she is the friend i text when people are in the bathroom stall next to me making weird noises. or when i am making weird noises, rather. she is the friend that will help me pop a zit and relishes in cracking my knuckles and can win any ugliest face contest, unfortunately. she’s a dead ringer for khloe kardashian in that she is somehow simultaneously loving and disruptive (“you look so hott, you big, fat idiot!”). she can make me laugh so hard that i pee my pants and am literally in pain but she also can lounge on the couch and watch crappy reality tv with me, providing only the most witty commentary. she knows everything about celebrities, fashion, makeup, and hair. she’s like that cool older cousin.

but she’s not my cousin. she’s my tall, blonde friend. duh.

and it’s her birthday! and she’s turning TWENTY! everybody wish morgan a happy, happy birthday! 

p.s. once upon a time, i had to shoot the p.k. goal to qualify my high school team for the state tournament(…i was the last resort, everyone else had already shot!). naturally, i missed. i was so, so sad and fell to the ground crying(it was kind of adam morrison, 2006 ncaa tournament type of moment, anyone get my reference?). no one and nothing could console me. the next day, morgan showed up at my house with a plate of sympathy brownies, iced with purple frosting and a little heart made out of red sprinkles in the middle and all was good in the world again. and that’s just the type of person morgan is.

also i hope this wasn’t too saptastic.

morgan’s not much of a sapster