a little bit of california //

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jeff + i went on a much needed visit to california this last week after he finished finals. when i say much needed...TRUST ME. ha. april was stressful + april was the month where i thought OH MY GOSH WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY LIFE?!?! like, 3,453 times. in fact, i would like to not be held responsible for anything that i did or said or ate during the month of april. THANK YOU!

but california. back to it. i feel like every time we come, the pictures are the same ol' same ol'. picture of flame broiler : check! picture of t-street : check! picture of me in a dorky hat : CHECK!

we mostly just maxed + relaxed in the true stapleton form (take-out food, game night + a movie) BUT some other highlights included : hiking valido // dirty mexican food // walks on the beach // lunch with kenna k. // blockhead ice cream in LA // korean bbq with my family // koa's blessing! // the park with my daddy-o // DISNEYLAND! // dole whip float // ...the tram ride home. disney takes it out of you! // timmy's pirate birthday party!

oh. and the bruce jenner interview. CAN WE TALK ABOUT IT? i love bruce. i really do. i feel like bruce has been going through SO MUCH pain/confusion/shame etc. etc. etc. + who am i to judge?! you do you, brucer! also he is so sweet and probably went through so much suffering and you know what? who cares. who cares! it will all be figured out later + let's just all be nice, right? ...but also AMBITIOUS DRESS CHOICE BRUCER. AMBITIOUS. that's all.

p.s. PRAY FOR MY PHONE. it is so broken. SO SO broken. mostly i just want all my disney pictures back. there is a REAL risqué splash mountain picture on there that needs to be saved for posterity. ;)

a visit home + ex-boyfriend contracts

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i went up to idaho for a few days last week to stock up on anklets (if you ever are in the moscow area, go to 'tye dye everything' in the back of mikey's gyros. $1 anklets in all sorts of colors plus the opportunity to scratch your head + think, 'how is this place still in business?') + good cooking. it was a SHORT visit but i left refueled, refocused + 30 pounds heavier.

ANYWAYS. thanks fam for having me! thanks idaho for the good weather! thanks random high school acquaintances for delightfully ignoring me!

warning :  this is where a rant begins...
...truly delightfully. i feel like there should be contracts handed out to people after high school graduation where you decide if you are going to be wavers or stop-and-catch-uppers or ignorers when you bump into each other in public. YOU KNOW?!

nothing is worse than not knowing. for instance : i hugged my friend's ex-boyfriend at the AT&T store because we had not established what we were!!!! WHAT ARE WE?!!?!?

also nothing is worse than becoming a waver to someone who you don't want to be a waver with. THESE CONTRACTS ARE IRREVERSIBLE. i stupidly waved to my high school gym teacher one day + now we are forever on waving terms +, let me tell you, it. is. exhausting. and stressful!

WAIT! on to something : in addition to handing out these contracts/agreements at the end of high school graduation, you should also hand them out after break-ups to your ex-lover AS WELL AS all of their family members and friends. am i right or what?!

THE END.

insta-important //

today i washed my hands like a doctor about to scrub-in
in a public restroom for no reason besides i wanted to look
important. an off-duty 22-year-old surgeon just easing my stresses
at the local target. it could happen.

i think i just looked like a girl who watches too much grey's anatomy. 
hrmph. 

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT :

getting a pedicure makes you feel 10 lbs. lighter.

three-day hair makes for the best braids.
googling 'am i mentally stable?!?' will get you nowhere.
GILMORE. GIRLS. period.

eating dried fruit + then sitting in a hot, enclosed tanning bed = bad idea.

no one on the internet wants to see a picture of your toes. post anyway.

p.s. happy second day of april! 

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thoughts on an evening walk //

i'm an overly self-critical underachiever. occasionally i will have the paralyzing thought :

WHAT IF I HAD ALWAYS TRIED HARD?
where would i be?
what if i had like, actually practiced my instrument?!
or didn't google-translate my way through spanish?!
or brushed my hair every once in a while?!?

i think i have watched too many episodes of dance moms + have convinced myself that i would have tried hard from the time i was little (like, super hard)(or had an abby lee miller-like character in my life violently berating me), then i would be a star at something. violin? ballet? soccer? reading? I DON'T KNOW NOR WILL I EVER. HOW SAD.

...but then i just flip on britney's greatest hits, keep walking + think, "meh."


BUT SERIOUSLY WHAT IF?
the end.